New Year's Realizations
by Sapphire Silhouette
Summary: After an initial bad impression of the new year, Lily realizes that maybe it isn't as bad as it seems.


**New Year's Realizations**

**By SapphireSilhouette**

It was five minutes until the year was officially over. As Lily looked around at all of the other students in the Gryffindor Common Room (there were many people there, since more and more students were staying at Hogwarts for the holidays, as it was the only place where the growing threat of Voldemort couldn't reach them), she wondered why she was incapable of having as much fun as they. Normally she would be right there beside her friends, enjoying herself and sipping a butterbeer. But tonight was different. Her best friends - Marlene McKinnon and Dorcas Meadowes - were with their respective boyfriends, thoroughly enjoying themselves and preparing to snog their significant others as soon as the new year began.

Of course, she could have spent the special moment with some of her other friends or even with complete strangers. But tonight she did not especially want to have fun. Although she would never admit it, she would much rather wallow in self-pity than have a good time. A week ago - on Christmas Eve - her boyfriend of four months - Matthew Davies - dumped her through owl post. If that wasn't a low blow, what was? The idiot didn't even have the guts to break her heart in person.

Although she told her friends that she was fine - who needed a bastard like that anyway? - she found herself thinking about it lately more than was healthy. What had she done wrong? Was it her personality, her appearance, or something else entirely? He had left her with no explanation.

"Ten! Nine! Eight!" people were shouting. Lily realized that this must be it. She picked up her drink.

"Seven! Six! Five!" She glanced at the other people in the room. Everyone seemed to be having a good time. Marlene and her boyfriend were having a premature snog. _Apparently some people have no self-control or patience_, Lily thought wryly.

"Four! Three! Two!" Lily glanced over in the direction of the Marauders. Sirius looked completely sloshed, his cheeks all rosy, a glassy look in his eyes, and a stupid grin on his face. Remus and Peter were more reserved but still quite happy. James glanced at Lily when he saw her looking in his direction. He grinned and raised his glass to her.

"ONE!" There was immediate uproar. Horns were blowing. Magical fireworks were exploding. People were kissing. Lily raised an eyebrow and raised her glass to James. He smiled even more widely, and they took a sip in unison.

After the initial chaos dissipated, people slowly began to get up and walk away, although Sirius was performing his own unique rendition of Auld Lang Syne. Lily could feel a headache forming. She put down her glass and rubbed her temples with her forefingers.

What an awful New Year's.

----

After shooing the frisky and completely useless Gryffindor Prefects out of the Common Room and into their respective dorms, Lily and James took it upon themselves to clean up the mess that was once the New Year's party.

For a while, they performed this menial task in silence, preferring to keep their thoughts to themselves. While Lily was still sulking over her failed relationship, James's ponderings were of a much more positive nature. He was thinking of how his and Lily's relationship had changed over the course of their Seventh Year. They had found it hard to get along before they came back to Hogwarts for their final year, when they were finally forced to work with and get to know one another.

His preconceptions of Lily were completely wrong, it turned out. Before, he had merely thought of her as a pretty face with the personality of a firecracker. As they slowly became friends, he learned that there was much more to this girl with fiery hair and wry smiles. She had real dreams, real aspirations, and real quirks that made her a far more interesting person than he had originally assumed.

He looked at her now. She had a look of deep concentration on her face as she picked up discarded bottles. Grinning at her apparent frustration with the mess, he went back to work, and soon they had cleaned up the entire room.

As soon as they were finished, Lily kicked off her shoes and collapsed on the couch, covering her eyes with one of her hands. James sat down beside her.

"So what's your problem, love? You look like you need a good, stiff drink," he told her.

She lifted her hand from her eyes and gave him a stern look. "You know I don't drink."

His eyes sparkled. "Prude."

She glared. "Are you _trying_ to get me hacked off at you?"

This made him grin. "You know the day wouldn't be complete without you informing me of my inadequacies as a human being."

She tried unsuccessfully to keep a smile off her face. "I don't understand why you like it when I lecture you."

He moved closer and tweaked her nose. "You just look so cute when you do it."

She rolled her eyes.

"Seriously, though, what's wrong? You know you can tell your good friend James anything!"

For all his teasing, he was entirely earnest when it came to the occasional heart-to-heart. He made a great confidant, although she would never have guessed it a year ago. She sighed. "Just the same old bullocks."

He nodded. "The ol' git's getting you down?"

"I wish it wouldn't bother me. I was just reminded of it when my friends had boys to snog tonight and I had no one."

He laughed. "No one? You know I'm always up for a good snog whenever you're in need!" He wiggled his eyebrows suggestively, and she punched his shoulder.

"I'm trying to be serious here!"

"And so was I!" He feigned hurt.

She rolled her eyes again and made a face at him.

"You know, if you keep doing that, your face will freeze that way. And you wouldn't want that, would you? You know I'd stop speaking to you if you suddenly became ugly."

"Great friend you are," she muttered, but she smiled all the same. His teasing had a good effect on her; she felt better already. "I don't know how you do it, but you always manage to put a smile on my face even when I'm feeling terrible."

"That's because I'm such a charmer. The ladies love me."

"What ladies? Nobody but me puts up with you, you stupid wanker."

"Ouch. That hurt! You have quite the harsh tongue, Evans!"

"My tongue is perfectly fine!"

He moved closer and whispered, "I bet it is."

She could feel a blush beginning to form. "You're not allowed to flirt with me!"

He smirked, a strange gleam appearing in his eyes. "I'll flirt with you if I wish, you saucy minx. You know you like it."

"I don't like what you're implying, Mr. Potter," she said loftily. "I am unaffected by your wooing words."

"Let's see if you're unaffected by this," he said, and suddenly his lips were on hers. There wasn't the cinematic feeling of complete perfection, but she liked it, and her pulse sped up as he rubbed his mouth against hers.

As quickly as it started, it was over. Lily opened her eyes and they immediately connected with his hazel ones. For a moment there was silence. Then Lily spoke, her mind racing. "James… we're friends, we probably shouldn't-"

But he interrupted her. His voice was lower than it normally was. "Lily - just this once, do what you want. Don't think of what we should or shouldn't do."

She needed no further urging. Running her hands through his hair, she pulled his face to hers and continued kissing him. And in that moment, she was happy.

"What the-" a voice suddenly interrupted them. They sprang apart and found a frazzled Peter staring at them. He had the sense to look embarrassed. "Er… well, I'll just be going now." And he practically sprinted back up the stairs to his dormitory.

Lily looked back at James and noticed that he had a goofy grin on his face. _Do I look like that too_? She wondered. _Probably_.

James coughed awkwardly. "Well, er…" he started. "I should… probably be going…" He started to get up.

She grabbed his arm and pulled him back down beside her. "Oh no you don't, James Potter. You're going to explain to me what just happened."

He ran a hand through his hair. "Well, I think we just kissed."

She snorted. "I'm aware of that. What I want to know is what you meant by that."

He gave her a blank look. "I thought my feelings for you have always been quite obvious."

"So," she said, suddenly feeling a bit nervous, "you still like me?"

"Like you?" he exclaimed, laughing a little. "I've practically been infatuated with you since Fifth Year."

"Oh," she said, at a loss for words.

"Well then. I guess this means you're going to be my date this weekend," he said, returning to his normal, self-assured attitude.

She raised her eyebrows. "Now, now, Potter, whatever gave you that impression?"

"This." He moved in again and kissed her.

She grinned slowly. "I'll think about it, then."

"Which means 'yes' in Lily Language. I always knew you'd fall for my charms someday."

She poked him. "Don't get too cocky, or I'll considering saying no to your offer."

He shook his head. "Lily, we both know we're destined to get married and have lots of redheaded babies. It's practically written in the stars."

After she rolled her eyes for the third time that morning, they both stood up.

"So I've come up with a New Year's resolution," he told her. When she raised her eyebrows, he continued, "To kiss you at every opportunity."

She slapped his shoulder.

"Oh, c'mon, you like it."

She pointedly ignored him, but a small grin appeared on her face. Looking sideways at the boy she just kissed, Lily realized that maybe this near year wasn't so bad after all.


End file.
